Desperate Teenage Lovedolls Blu-ray Review

Eclectic DVD

Blu-ray Release: April 17, 2026

Video: 1.33:1/1080p/Color

Audio: English LPCM 2.0 stereo

Subtitles: English 

Run Time: 49:34

Director: David Markey

“Thanks for killing my mom.”

“Hey, no problem.”

In a scene with no values …where climbing to the top means climbing into bed …where drugs & cheap thrills fill the date book …where rock n’ roll means death & destruction …comes the all-girl punk band, The Teenage Lovedolls. (From We Got Power’s official synopsis)

Los Angeles’ underground punk and hardcore scene of the 1980s was most famously chronicled by Penelope Spheeris in the first of her trilogy of documentaries, entitled Decline of Western Civilization (1981), and her first narrative feature, Suburbia (1983). The scene was further represented in Adam Small & Peter Stuart’s Another State of Mind (1984) and Alex Cox’s satirical sci-fi classic Repo Man (1984). All of these films were gritty and subversive products of the counterculture, yet, compared to David Markey’s Desperate Teenage Lovedolls (1984), they were glitzy Hollywood productions.

Markey’s rags-to-riches-to-rags musical was shot on Super 8mm on a reported budget of $250 (plus bus fare) was the follow-up to Markey’s own scene documentary, The Slog (1982), which was itself a follow-up to his work on the We Got Power zine. At first glance, the film’s gritty appearance and casual depiction of crime, homelessness, and drug use might put Desperate Teenage Lovedolls in the same category as feel-bad cult classics, like Lech Kowalski’s Story of a Junkie (1987) and Buddy Giovinazzo’s Combat Shock (1986), but most scenes, even violent ones, are performed with tongue firmly in cheek.

It is essentially a punk rock, home movie spoof of Valley of the Dolls – a gag that is fully verified when guitarist Kitty is seen literally reading Jacqueline Susann’s 1966 novel – made by edgy friends with absurdist senses of humor and a need to put on a show. That’s the spirit it should be watched in. It’s fast-paced, doesn’t overstay its welcome, and, while Markey focuses on the city’s sleazy side, I imagine that the film conjures enormous levels of nostalgia in Gen X SoCalers. The title characters are portrayed by amateur actresses and musicians Jennifer Schwartz (sister of producer Jordan), Hilary Rubens, and Janet Housden, who are joined by Redd Kross’ Steve and Jeff McDonald, Black Flag’s Dez Cadena, Darkside’s Herb Lienau, The Bangles’ Victoria Peterson, Circle Jerks’ Aaron Glascock, and SIN 34’s Phil Newman and Michael Glass (Markey was also in SIN 34).

Markey continued working with Black Flag making music videos and documenting their final tour for the film Reality 86'd (1991). He then became an important chronicler of the next generation of bands, collaborating with Sonic Youth, Dinosaur Jr., The Meat Puppets, and Nirvana on music videos, shorts, and concert movies. His biggest documentary was 1991: The Year Punk Broke (1992), which followed Nirvana and Sonic Youth on the road at the dawn of their superstardom. He also directed the definitive retrospective Circle Jerks doc, My Career as a Jerk (2012) and, most recently, The Secret Lives of Bill Bartell (2025), about the musician and manager, aka: Pat Fear.

Video

Desperate Teenage Lovedolls was released independently on VHS in a clamshell case with a hand-drawn insert in 1984. It was basically impossible to differentiate a bootleg from We Got Power Productions’ official tape. We Got Power offered the film on limited edition DVD from their website (release date unknown), which is currently listed as sold out. I also found a random double-feature DVD for sale from Frolic Pictures on Amazon that features Desperate Teenage Lovedolls with Ted Post’s The Baby (1973) of all things.

Eclectic DVD’s Blu-ray debut features a new 4K restoration of the original Super 8 masters. Super 8 film resolution isn’t quite up to 4K or 1080p standards, but a nice, uncompressed HD transfer has measurable advantages over a DVD release. This transfer draws just about as much detail, color, and grain texture as can be expected from the format. The print damage artifacts, mostly vertical smears and scratches, are largely unobtrusive, and good digital grading helps boost the dynamic range and separate elements, in spite of the natural blooming effects inherent in the format. Note that the opening credits have been digitally recreated in HD.

Audio

Desperate Teenage Lovedolls comes fitted with a newly mastered 2.0 stereo mix. I can’t find any information about the original specs, but I assume it was mixed in mono. I also assume, being a Super 8 movie, that there was a lot of ADR. Despite The Slog also being shot on 8mm with live sound, several (most?) dialogue scenes are clearly dubbed, leading to unavoidable inconsistencies. 

The everpresent musical soundtrack is also largely (entirely?) added in post and is similarly inconsistent based on its source. The punk tracks and original songs are basically CD quality and fill out the stereo channels nicely. Most of the incidental music is stolen from other movies and several songs (“Stairway to Heaven,” “Purple Haze,” a few others) are recreated so as to avoid copyright infringement.

Extras

• Commentary with director David Markey and producer Jordan Schwartz – A low-energy hangout session that covers the film’s production, the new restoration, the cast, the locations, the era, and the duo’s other early work. 

• Redd Kross’ “Ballad of a Lovedoll” music video (1:59, SD)

• Deleted scene reel (9:55, HD)

• The Story of the Desperate Teenage Lovedolls and We Got Power (9:07, SD) – Markey walks us through the history of his zine, the LA scene, and the making of the film.

• 40th Anniversary Panel (32:16, HD) – LA Times critic Mark Olsen hosts a post-movie Q&A with Markey and actors Jennifer Schwartz, Steven McDonald, and Tracey Lea, who discuss their influences, their performances, and their music.

• Bonus film: Lovedoll Superstar (1986, 1.20:59) – Markey and company’s direct follow-up, Lovedoll Superstar, has also been remastered in 4K from its original Super 8 source and includes stereo and 5.1 remix audio options. This is a slightly pricier, more professional production with better sync’d sound and even more original music. Returning stars Jennifer Schwartz, Steve McDonald, Janet Housden, and Kim Pilkington, alongside cameos from Dead Kennedys frontman Jello Biafra and Sky Saxon of The Seeds.

  • Commentary with Markey, Schwartz, and stars Jeffrey McDonald, Steve McDonald, and Jennifer Schwartz – Another, sillier hangout track with plenty of behind-the-scenes anecdotes.

  • Deleted scenes/alternate takes (3:12, 3:14, 3:58, 00:41, 5:00, 1:57, 1:31, 2:03, 1:14, 4:04, 3:16, 1:13, HD)

• David Markey Tribute at American Cinematheque Egyptian Theater (13:55, SD)

• Remastered theatrical trailers

The images on this page are taken from the BD and sized for the page. Larger versions can be viewed by clicking the images. Note that there will be some JPG compression.