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Writer's pictureTyler Foster

Joysticks Blu-ray Review

MVD Visual

Blu-ray Release: May 7th, 2024

Video: 1.78:1/1080p/Color

Audio: English LPCM 2.0 Mono

Subtitles: English

Run Time: 104:24

Director: Greydon Clark


For teenagers with nothing better to do than fill the days by goofing off (and potentially looking for a sexy hookup), there's no better place to hang out than The Video Arcade, run by Jefferson Bailey (Jeff (Scott McGinnis). One of those clientele, Patsy (Corinne Bohrer), happens to be the daughter of a prominent local businessman, Joseph Rutter (Joe Don Baker), who doesn't like the kind of crowd that hangs out there, including nerdy Eugene (Leif Green), and the slovenly McDorfus (Jim Greenleaf). As the animosity between Rutter and the Arcade's staff turns into all-out war, Rutter moves to get the arcade shut down, prompting the employees and patrons to fight back.


Look, there's no sense beating around the bush: personally, I don't think Joysticks is very good. It's not because it's a low-brow sex comedy, either -- I saw H.O.T.S. for the first time this year and found it pretty charming. No, in this case it's because the antics in Joysticks are so aggressively cartoonish that it ends up coming off like a parody of the kind of movie the filmmakers are trying to make. After McDorfus (even his name sounds like a parody of the name of a fat guy in a fake slobs vs. snobs comedy) let out his second earth-shattering fart, I found myself thinking of The Fatties: Fart 2, the fake movie starring Jack Black's character shown at the beginning of Tropic Thunder. (He ends up farting four more times, including one instance the subtitles describe as "wet.")



In fairness to Joysticks, it is bad in a way that many people have an affection for. Aside from Joe Don Baker and Napoleon Dynamite's Jon Gries, the acting from most of the cast here reminds me of certain Troma films, or Charles Band (or, frankly, comedy porn movies from the 1980s, like Body Girls). This is the kind of movie that plays a tuba when the fat guy is on screen and the camera blatantly pans down to a woman's chest at the first opportunity. I can't say this interpretation works for me personally, but it's not hard to imagine movies like this achieving the movie version of horseshoe theory, circling around through irony and back to a sincere type of enjoyment. It's certainly a Type of Film, and I don't think it can be imitated without becoming soulless.


The main problem with Joysticks even as trashy VHS-era fun is that the characters are all pretty unpleasant. At the center of the action is Jefferson Bailey, a smarmy, square-jawed egomaniac. I guess he's meant to be a Bill Murray-style antihero, but mostly he seems like he was part of the jock fraternity in Revenge of the Nerds. Even here he spends a fair amount of time bullying Eugene, the hapless loser whose whole function in the film is to be the victim in wacky hijinks. Both of them end up playing second fiddle to McDorfus, who is so effectively slobbed up in a greasy T-shirt and a sheen of flop sweat that he's actually kind of repulsive to look at -- you feel like looking at him too long will cause you to smell him through the screen. With clean clothes and dry hair, he still wouldn't be very funny, but he also wouldn't be so off-putting. Most of the women adopt painfully exaggerated valley girl accents in exchange for jokes, and Joe Don Baker is clearly on autopilot, giving a performance that embodies the very spirit of "functional." The only cast member who commits in a semi-interesting way is Gries as King Vidiot, a goth punk who ends up mounting his own campaign against the arcade. In a better movie, you can see the performance working, but Gries has nothing to bounce off of.



To add insult to injury, Joysticks is also kind of light on the kind of nudity that I would assume viewers are expecting to see. One of the scenes also turns out to be a weirdly dramatic flashback of a father beating his daughter. Uhhh...sexy?


Video

The text on the back of the package says this 2K transfer is sourced "from 35mm film elements." If those elements weren't the negative, they were mighty impressive, because this gorgeous, richly-filmic transfer looks pretty fantastic. Grain is healthy, detail is very strong, and colors are mostly nice, although some scenes waver a touch warmer or cooler. The only semi-notable issue throughout is minor amounts of print damage, including what looks like some kind of pinhole through a few of the shots. A deserving tribute to the work of the son of famed director Josef von Sternberg (cinematographer Nicolas von Sternberg, who you may remember being immortalized in Dolemite is My Name).


The packaging also says that the scan was done back in 2015, which is when Scorpion Releasing offered Joysticks on Blu-ray for the first time, so it seems very likely that this is the same presentation (although I do not have the older disc and could not say for certain; I scanned MVD's facebook page to see if they mentioned doing additional work on the transfer when announcing the disc, but could not find the announcement post).



Audio

Only one option is available, an LPCM 2.0 Mono track. It will not be surprising that Joysticks is a fairly straightforward aural experience: mostly dialogue, a handful of pop songs, and the occasional antic necessitating some sound effects. It all sounds deeply adequate. English subtitles are also included. Note: initial copies of Joysticks shipped with an audio error; you can read about MVD's replacement program here.


Extras

  • Fan commentary by MVD Rewind's Eric D. Wilkinson, Cereal at Midnight host Heath Holland, and DiabolikDVD's Jesse Nelson - Much like the feature itself, there's really no point in pretending that I had much interest in hearing a fan commentary on a movie I didn't like, so I merely skipped through a few bits of it. The good news is that the three guys are pretty knowledgeable about the movie and where it fits into its subgenre, meaning the track offers up plenty of insight into the making of the film and details about the cast and crew rather than coming off more like a hangout session. Not sure I agree with their assessment that the film would be "canceled" by anyone but the stingiest puriteens; I think most younger audiences would get bored quicker than they'd get upset.

  • Commentary by director Greydon Clark - Carried over from the 2015 Scorpion Blu-ray.

  • Interview with director Greydon Clark (17:44) - Carried over from the 2015 Scorpion Blu-ray.

  • Coin Slots Faux "Trailer" Short (2:49) - I'll be honest, I thought this pleasant short (which does a great job of evoking Joysticks without being a direct rip-off) was better than the real thing.

  • Theatrical Trailer - In addition to a trailer for Joysticks, trailers for Ski Patrol, Hardware Wars, Dirty Laundry, and Hail Caesar (all also available from MVD) are included.


The one-disc release comes in a transparent Blu-ray case, with reversible cover art (both sides of which feature the widely-remembered painting from the VHS artwork and movie poster). In addition, there is a double-sided mini-poster tucked into the case. It's a little strange, as the poster's designs are based on the packaging for this disc, so one side of the poster advertises...the fact that the poster is included with the Blu-ray, and the other side advertises that the film is being released on Blu-ray. Sure, why not.

Conclusion

Even by the standards of 1980s R-rated T&A movies, I couldn't help but feel like Joysticks failed to earn my quarters. That said, I also understand the power of a nostalgic favorite, so even if my moment to watch it passed 20 years ago, it's still commendable that MVD has brought the movie back to the home video market, with a fine transfer, the original extras, and a couple of new ones to boot.


The images on this page are taken from the Blu-ray and sized for the page. Larger versions can be viewed by clicking the images.

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